Have you ever had a day or week (or longer) that just wasn’t going your way when the world is out to get you through no fault of you own, and you just can’t seem to win? The coffee isn’t strong enough; the sun’s in your eyes; and the dog trips you as you head out the door. “It’ll get better once I get to work,” you tell yourself, but, instead, all your co-workers and boss have made it their personal missions to make your life miserable—poor, innocent, you. Right?
I had one such week recently and was doing quite well at indulging in self-pity about my plight. Then, I came across something seemingly random that changed my entire perspective on the horrific trauma I thought I’d just encountered at the hands of everyone around me. Scrolling through social media as I do when I’m trying to procrastinate doing anything productive, I came across a motivational quote. “Stay positive. The only difference between a good day and bad day is your attitude.” (Dennis S. Brown) That’s easy for him to say; doesn’t he know that none of what’s happened to me is my fault? Why was this even on my newsfeed anyway? I was looking for pessimistic memes that validated my anger. Who does this guy think he is?
I’m a woman of action, so obviously I decided to see who this guy was and why I should care less about what he had to say. He probably isn’t even a real person. I proceeded to “Google” him like all good adults do these days when they need to know something they don’t know (dangerous, I know). What I found did not make me very happy. I discovered that Dennis S. Brown is a successful businessman, entrepreneur, and motivational speaker who’s been complimented by the likes of Les Brown (a world renown speaker if you didn’t know). He is known as “Mr. Attitude” and for his Attitude Adjustment seminars. I was feeling thoroughly attacked at this point. I wasn’t sure who else was out to get me. However, I was starting to feel like maybe some of my misery could have possibly been my fault—I know, preposterous!
As I begrudgingly read on, I found one of Brown’s noteworthy quotes: “Your attitude is showing.” He argues that you can make or break yourself with your attitude. People can be influenced to think you are better or worse looking, competent/incompetent, and so on, all based on your attitude. Interesting. I’ll give him that. I wasn’t convinced that it applied to me just yet, but I was willing to mull it over.
As a result, I began to think a little bit about the bad things that had been piling up on me for a week. Maybe it wasn’t as much about those things happening to me as it was about the way I was perceiving and receiving them. Maybe, just maybe, it didn’t matter if people weren’t being fair to me. Perhaps it was about my bad attitude toward the first thing, which made me upset about the next little event that eventually lead to my attitude drawing the rest of the negatives that followed to me like a magnet. What hadn’t started as my fault ended up being exactly that—MY fault. I might not be able to stop adversity from coming into my life, but I can stop allowing it to have power over me.
I tell my kids “don’t be a victim,” yet here I was victiming like I’d never victimed before. Yeah, I know those aren’t really words, but go with me here. After deciding I might need to attend one of these Attitude Adjustment seminars, I started paying attention to life going on around me. I started realizing that I’d gotten wrapped up in a cycle that I had to consciously step out of or be doomed to continue. I had to take my power back. It took a conscious effort on my part, but guess what—life got better immediately. No, the undesirable events in my life didn’t stop. I just didn’t let them into my spirit. I quit wallowing and opened my Bible because that made me think of a verse that I’d learned but had apparently not taken to heart the way I should have. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 CSB: For although we live in the flesh, we do not wage war according to the flesh, since the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but are powerful through God for the demolition of strongholds. We demolish arguments and every proud thing that is raised up against the knowledge of God, and we take every thought captive to obey Christ.”
I don’t know about you, but I have quite a number of thoughts a day. I think I need to be mindful of taking those captive a little more often so they don’t take me captive. After all, those thoughts become expressions on my face and through my actions with others. Maybe the world wasn’t actually out to get me with that “random” quote that led me to all of this revelation. Maybe God was trying to discipline me, to build my character, to make me better.
I started my bad day at the end of my bad week with my bad attitude that was definitely showing to everyone around me. By the end of that day at the end of that week, I had hope and a plan to do better, to be better. Life is hard, but we have to keep fighting to become what we were created to be. I believe I’m meant to be a messenger of hope in some small way, and I truly pray that’s happened today. “This is the day the Lord has made; let’s rejoice and be glad in it.” — Psalms 118:24 CSB
